Annie, Diane and a Grown Up Named Corey

WALK INS: $18 HAIRCUT

I'd stopped to admire the car, but the invitation for a haircut posted across the parking lot finally captured my attention.  I'd not had time to get my hair cut before leaving Houston, and now it was at that point where it was driving me crazy.  I sauntered into the "salon".

Annie was a tall blond I guessed to be about 32 or 35.  Diane was a cute, pixie-ish girl of 28.  Annie was tint-dying a client; Diane was finishing a milk shake at the register, waiting for a client to walk in.  Hello!

"Just a standard, traditional cut: close on the sides, longish on top.  Add some to the bald area please."   Yuck, yuck, yuck and off the three of us went on a gab-fest.

  

Annie: "Where are all the men in this po-dunk town?  I can't find a man anywhere!"

Diane: "Oh, Annie, you just try too hard."

Annie: "Maybe it's too late for me.   How old do you think Diane is?

Joe: "Mmmm...27?"

Diane: Wow!  Good guess.  I'm 28.   Who old do you think that old blond is over there?"

Joe: "mmmm...maybe 32 or 35?"

Annie: "I want to marry you!  I want to marry you!"

Diane: "Great!  She's 42.  Now I'll have to listen to her carp on and on about how youthful she looks.  With a face like an old shoe, she thinks she looks youthful just because you said she thinks she looks like 35.  Do you know how hard you've made it for me?  She'll be all: 'I'm Penelope Cruz.  I'm Miss Amy Adamms."

Annie: "Well, I just wish I could fine me a man in this town."

  

On and on for the next 5 minutes (didn't take long; I don't have much hair).  When I left I got a chorus of "Thank you and please come back soon." from the two stylists while the matron in the next chair rolled her eyes and just laughed and laughed.

==============

Sunday morning.   I'm up really early and ready to shove off to Homer.  I have a long day ahead of me, so I didn't make coffee at the RV site.  Safeway Starbuck's isn't open yet so I decide on a cup of McDonald's coffee and discovered a whole new world:  did you know that McDonald's includes folks who are challenged in its hiring practices?  Is that the politically-correct term?   I don't frequent McDonald's so I didn't know that.   Anyway, just before 8 a.m. I met Robert, an apple-shaped, harried-by-existence store manager who reminded me of the cartoon character in Alice in Wonderland who waddles around fretting about "being late for a very important date".  Busily behind him was Corey, a physically challenged kid who apparently steps up and comes to his rescue rather often.  

Robert: "Oh, hi.  How are ya?   What'll it be?"

Joe: "Just a coffee and a bran muffin please."

Robert:  "Oh.  Uh-oh.  A coffee and a bran muffin; a coffee and a bran muffin...

Corey (bleary-and-red-eyed as he hobbles over): "I got this, Robert.  You go check on the English muffins."

Robert: "Muffins.  Muffins.  Right.  I'll check on muffins; you get this guy."  Robert waddles off.

Corey (sighing): "Almost time for my shift to end."

Joe: "End?  It's not even 8 a.m."

Corey:  "I started at 11 last night.  What a night!"

Joe: "I didn't know McDonald's is open 24 hours  You look kinda young to be working a night shift."

Corey: "Not really.  I just turned 16.  But these nights sure are aging me fast."

Joe: "Lots of interesting people?"

Corey: "It's not generally too bad.  But last night a lot of drunks.  Had one come up to the drive-thru window and demand food for free.  Didn't want to pay for it."  

Joe: "So what do you do?  Call the cops?"

Corey: "Cops?  No.  You just learn to handle them.  You gotta be careful though.  Never know when they're carrying.  Like last night.  We just tell him that there is no free food; he has to pay.   He starts going off about there should be free food all across America.  I take over from the girl at the window.  She gets scared.  Not fair she has to deal with them.  And the drunks?  You just start sliding the window very slowly closed.  Not too fast; they get excited.  If he takes out a gun, I have to use the window lock and beat it away from the window.   But he eventually calmed down.  He ended up just walking away mumbling and complaining that paying for food wasn't democratic.  But I'm really beat this morning.  I'm glad my shift is over."
Joe: "Well I'm glad it ended well.  I hope you have better nights."

Corey: "Oh, this wasn't bad.  It just gets old very quickly.  Next weekend it'll really be wild.  The drunks all come out for the holiday weekends.  Start drinking mid-week and don't stop until Tuesday.  I feel like I'm getting to be an old man fast."

From out of the mouth of a challenged but quite capable 16 year old!    And so I left Corey to prepare for the end of his shift and the beginning of the rest of his life. 

God bless the very, very good people of Soldotna, Alaska.   My heart goes out to you!